So @daley_84 from the Comfort in Sound blog tagged me in this here meme (click the link to see his answers and the other tagees then have a look round his excellent Dad (and other stuff) blog). It looked suspiciously like one I’d just done so I prodded it a bit, took its temperature and established that it was a brand new meme, and not the one I’d done that had morphed a bit. Do you know why? Because it has one whole less question. 11 instead of 12. However, my suspicions linger. Last time I did the 12 question the questions I asked were less than searching and the tagees hard to find and also already doing it. So I’m bending the rules a bit. Here are my answers to the questions but that is as far as it goes. I may be a cheat but I’m a cheat that’s now done this 3 times in slightly different forms. Here we go….
1) Which character do you prefer from only fools and horses, Grandpa or Uncle Albert and why?
Grandad because he had a better hat.
2) If you had 3 wishes what would they be other than money, and eternal life?
Firstly the other obvious one – happiness and health for both my kids. After that I’d like a superpower that allowed me to turn any given politician I chose in to a warthog just before they were about to give a speech and for the X-Factor to be banned forever. And Brighton to get promoted to the Premiership. And a never-ending bottle of rum. That’s five wishes isn’t it? *checks* Bugger – the first three of those then.
3) If you could live in any period of time when would you live and why?
The 1960s. It’s when we first started dragging ourselves up in to a modern society yet I always imagine it to be a lot more relaxed and laid back than today’s “always on” world. Plus there was Northern Soul and The Beatles on the record players, clubs and radios, satire on the TV for the first time and football with proper tackling in black and white.
4) If you had to live as the opposite gender for 1 day what would you do?
Pray that the painters weren’t in and that I didn’t have to give birth that day.
5) Would you rather be a pirate or a ninja and why?
A pirate. I love boats and the sea and I do a mean ‘har har’. Plus I was once on pirate radio as a stooge though I don’t think anyone was listening as it was a comedy Drum n Bass show at 3am
6) What would be your catchphrase if you were a game show host?
‘Nice to see you get nothing in this bin for saying what you see’
7) If you had to write a book what would you write about?
I’ve always wanted to write a travel book. Two of my favourite authors, Paul Theroux and William Dalrymple are brilliant travel writers. If anyone reading this – yes you Mr Agent searching for new travel writing talent – wants to pay me to travel by train round South East Asia with the family and write a hilarious yet touching travelogue I’m yer man *hopeful face*.
8) If you could choose a fictional character from a Book/TV/Movie to be real who would you choose and why?
I think most fictional characters are based, at least in part, on real people. I really hope there’s a real Grisham from the original CSI out there, an intelligent and scientific person solving crime with integrity and compassion. I don’t like his Miami equivalent Horatio Kane though – too much unironic sunglasses removal.
9) What would you like to be your legacy to be?
Happy, healthy, clever, well-adjusted, polite children. The polite could be stretching it if they inherit my potty mouth.
10) Which Cartoon Character best sums you up and why?
A cross between Homer Simpson and Daddy Pig. Basically a Dad who loves his family but sometimes gets distracted and drinks too much beer or sets fire to the BBQ.
11) Why is your favourite colour your favourite?
I answered this on another meme funnily enough. Eggshell – because my wife says so.